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Friday, January 21, 2011

Excruciatingly beautiful

After 7.5 long months of waiting, I am proud to say that we have reached another milestone...Micah has cut not 1 but 2 teeth!!! Before I say anything else, just take a look....


Amazing, right?! ....OK so maybe you can't exactly see them in a picture, but I assure you, they are there..bottom gum, right in a row. Nothing is coming in on top yet, but I am definitely glad to know that our little man does in fact have teeth in his head!

At first I was excited because it is yet another milestone in my baby boy's life, but as I think more about it, I come closer to my conclusion that motherhood is the hardest thing in the world! Not because of the sleepless nights, endless responsibilities, or the laundry pile that never seems to get smaller...but because every day, as I watch my baby boy take another step toward independence, my heart breaks again and again. I am so proud of everything he learns, every inch he grows, and now every teeth he gets...but the constant reminder that I am never going to be able to slow down time is excruciating! I am finding myself trying to desperately hold on to these last few little 'baby-like' qualities that seem to be moving further and further behind us with every passing day, but they are so fleeting. I think for that reason, I am figuring out that motherhood is the most beautiful, excruciating thing I have ever lived through. I heard someone say "our babies are born in total dependence, and with every passing day, they take one step away from us until they are able to stand on their own"...that never really made sense until now, but it is harder than ever to accept that reality.

I am so honored to have the privilege of being mother to the most amazing baby boy in the world! And I guess for today, all I can do is hug him as much as he will let me, enjoy each day, never take anything for granted....and keep the video camera handy!

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